Week 2 WI

WI this morning... 2.4 this week... WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!

I only expected about 1kg as it is week 2. However it was TTOTM last week so that must have affected my weight loss. I also didn't exercise as much this week. Only 4 days of 20mins. This week I plan on doing 40mins this week as I am going out for dinner on Thursday and am planning on having a decent meal with some chips.

I usually save points every day as I know weekends are my weakness and being on holidays this week I think it is going to be a little harder to save points but I am doing well so far. As I didn't eat all my points last week last night I was able to have KFC chips and a chocolate and I still had some save points and all my exercise points.

I am very proud of my efforts so far and the losses are keeping me motivated. Now all I have to do is stop thinking about Nutella... Last night all I could think about was Nutella. What is would be like to eat the whole jar... lmao. I know I shouldn't and I am not feeling emotional at the moment so I should be ok this week.

I really need to work on the emotional eating. I eat for every reason you can imagine especially boredom and feeling sad or angry. I am using rewards this time around to stop me from eating when I am happy so I hope that at least changes one of my habits. When I get to 90kgs I am going to the movies at Gold Class which I haven't done for a few years so that should be good. I only have 0.8kgs for that to happen so it will probably be next week.

One funny thing atm my partner and I weigh exactly the same weight. We both weighed in this morning and it is exactly. That should keep us going for another few weeks to see who will lose more. Not that we compete with each other it is just an interesting consequence of WW!

I really would like to reach goal. I haven't reached it with all my time at WW's and I have actually lowered my GW this time around. It was 64 but I have changed it to 60. I would like to have a little bit of room to move back up if I find 60 to hard to maintain. I am hoping it isn't but just in case. It also give me a point where I can say oh oh I need to pay attention again without going over my healthy BMI.

I wont be measuring until next months. I want to track that also but I think to see a real difference monthly will be better.

So my goals for this week are:

• stick to my meal planner
• track anything unexpected
• drink my water
• exercise 40mins at least 4-6 times this week

Measurements 22/3/10

R Arm : 35cms
L Arm: 34cms
Chest: 104cms
Waist: 107cms
Hips: 128.5cms
R Leg: 75.4cms
L Leg: 74.5cms
R Calf: 45cms
L Calf: 45cms

20mins everyday is my goal. I have been trying to get as many kilometres in that time as possible. Today I managed 2.1kms! Although I got less calories on my heart rate monitor. God I am so glad I brought that thing!! Best investment I have made. It keeps me motivated as every Sunday an alarm goes off and tells me the number of times I exercise and the total number of calories burned.

Polar and WW are my friends... lol.
They will help me reduce those measurements!

Hard Work Pays Off!!!

Well week 1 WI this morning - lost 3.6kgs!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was expecting maybe a kilo due to it being TTOTM and OMG when I stepped on those scales and saw that weight loss I was so excited. I almost wanted to dance around the bathroom. I was positive I would only have a small loss. Although I was hoping for a good loss so keep my motivation high.

The excitement you get when your hard work pays off! No junk food or high point snacks. I am also excited that I didn't feel the need to sabotage this by eating after WI. Although the fact that I had to head to work meant I was immediately distracted. That was definitely part of my problem last time I did WW.

I have been tossing up the idea of returning to WW because I want to become a LTM. Although I am just not sure I can justify the money when I know I can do it myself. Last time I attended meetings I ended up becoming a recorder I was there so long. The bonus was that I got to attend the meetings for free. Then I started focusing more on my job than on my own weight loss, which my leader warned me can sometimes happen. You get more excited by other peoples losses than your own.

So I am just not sure about that but I would really like to be a member. I think it is more about the amount my book shows I have lost, than actually being a member as I was attending meetings for so long that sometimes I would tune out because I had heard it all. Then again sometimes it's what you already know that you don't do.

Oh well I will keep it in the back of my mind. For now I am just so excited about this weeks weight loss that it has inspired me to join a few online challenges.

I was hoping to measure myself tonight and post it but I will have to post it tomorrow.

Parties!!!

When I first started WW I would try and find any excuse possible to NOT follow the program. Even if it was for one day. After WI each week I would always go to Red Rooster on the way home and get LOTS of food. I had this motto... food has no points after WI!

If I had a party or an event to go to I would try and stay within my points but if it didn't happen then I would have the excuse that I had a party.

I never even considered that I was sabotaging myself... or letting myself down. Maybe I am older now and understand things better. Maybe I just feel differently about my weight loss... I had so much to lose then and although I really wanted to lose it, I don't actually think I believed I would. Until I started to and I knew the program worked. But I still kept doing those silly things.

Last night I had my cousins engagement and after having to buy pants that fitted because the zipper on my favourites broke, I decided I would eat my planned dinner before I went so that I wouldn't be tempted to eat the finger foods. I was determined that I wasn't going to give in even before I left. When I got there and saw that they had chips, lollies and almonds on every table my first thought was 'hmmm I wonder if those almonds are salted'. Close inspection showed they weren't. I knew they would save me if needed. Even after a crazy night filled with family dramas, all I ate was 4 almonds at 1/2 a point.

I am so damn proud of myself that I want to scream!!! I have never been this good. Never found away around my excuses. The best part is it is TTOTM and I was still able to say no. I even got on the treadmill before going and again today.

My partner was a little miffed that I wouldn't let her eat the chips! Ho hum. If were going to do this there were much better options than chips.

WI tomorrow morning. I am really hoping for a loss but because it is TTOTM I know it wont be as good as it could. I have usually given up after gains so I really don't want any of those. I never quit just end up eating bad that night or for a week. I am going to need a plan for that too. I am just hoping it wont be for a few weeks yet.

Starting Again!!

So until 6 months ago I was doing really well. I was losing weight, toning and generally healthy. I was running (well really it was probably jogging but I am being positive) 4kms per day and absolutely loving it. If I didn't exercise I noticed immediately how it affected me. I even quit smoking and managed to continue losing weight. I was down to about 75kgs and had a whole new wardrobe.
When I started WW in 2002 I weighed 124.9. I don't know that I have ever been 75kgs before. Well since I was about 11 anyway! I started gaining weight when I was about 5. Yes 5!!! Now when I hear stories about children being overweight I just want to cry. I was bullied in primary school and high school for my weight but never really thought I had any control over it. I remember when I was about 10 I asked my mum to take me to WW and she said lets wait till your a little older. Boy do I wish she had just listened to me. I figured there was nothing wrong with eating the way I did. Having no friends I had no reason to go outside and play. I didn't know any better! But now I do.
After a few set backs last year I have managed to regain about 20kgs. My vice is food. I just adore it and although I had learnt to control the desire (or at least thought I had) I had just forgotten that I cared. It's funny how mental health affects your sense of control. As my anxiety got worse the amount of food I ate would increase until it was almost no problem to get home from work and eat until it was time to go to bed.
Now I am medicated and in much better control I have decided it is time to start again. At 96.8kgs I have NOTHING to wear. During my previous weight loss journey before this hiccup I was throwing out clothes or donating them or selling them as soon as they no longer fitted. Since regaining these 20kgs I have had many days where I really didn't know what I was going to wear and occasionally have had to borrow clothes. My wardrobe consist almost entirely of size 12 clothes. I went through it and managed to discover a few 14's and 16's that must have been bypassed (luckily) and so have been wearing these few items to death.
I think the turning point came last weekend after finishing my jar of nutella (with a spoon) and realising that I had an engagement party to go to next weekend. This wouldn't be a problem as I have a few work clothes that would have been ok. UNTIL... I had another look at the invitation... Semi-formal/Cocktail (enter expletives here... and many of them).
Hence I put that spoon down... after finishing the jar of course and made my weekly eating plan for the next week. I have managed to exercise every day for 20 mins... which isn't to bad after 6 months off and have tracked everything that has passed my lips. I have saved points and rekindled the desire to get back into that wardrobe!!! I was reminded how important that was on Tuesday when one of the only 2 pairs of slacks I have for work broke. I went to the toilet before going home and as I was doing up the zipper... it broke... lucky my shirt was long enough to cover it. Devastated that it meant I had to go shopping for clothes when I have a WHOLE wardrobe of clothes that don't fit has just made me more determined.
Plus, I always wanted to get to goal. I never wanted to just focus on any number. I want to be in my healthy weight range. I want to be normal not obese or overweight. I want to know that I can wear anything and not be worrying that my stomach is hanging over my pants. I really want my outsides to match my insides. I want to be hot and able to wear ANYTHING I want!!!
So here I am blogging to cement this commitment. Whether anyone reads it or not. I want to know that I can do this. I need to prove it to myself. After getting so close I know it is possible. I have even lowered my goal weight from 64 to 60 so I am midway in my healthy weight range. I don't want to just get there... I want to absolutely smash it.
This decision has already made me light. Having fat on your body is not nearly as heavy as the weight you carry around when you are half hearted about your decision. So no more half heartedness. I have worked out that if I am really good and resist hot chips and nutella (which believe me will be tough) that I can make it to goal by the end of the year.
So that is my goal. December here I come!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!